I upset someone. I have strong beliefs and I posted my beliefs on my Facebook page. It upset someone and they "unfriended" me. I probably should be upset about this. I'm not, but I probably should be. I am not even sure what exactly prompted them to do this. It was my page, my beliefs and my opinions. The fact that it posted on their page is not my specific problem, just a problem that Facebook has. I call this one of Facebook's little quirks.
The funny thing is THEY had no problem posting their beliefs on MY home page. Now I've long believed that they and I wouldn't necessarily see eye to eye politically but it never would have entered my mind to un-friend them because they felt strongly in favor of something I felt equally in disfavor of. I was raised that every one of us has the right to an opinion and the expressing of them should never be censored. My parents taught my brother and I that our rights were hard won and we should always use them as there are those in this world who would love to be able to use the freedoms we take for granted. Also, the lack of valuing our freedoms can (and will) result in our losing them. Unfortunately, there are many for whom this is a one way street. They feel duty bound to share their beliefs while ignoring or denying us ours. In the end, when you surround yourself with those who feel exactly the same way you do, one of you becomes unnecessary It is through differing opinions and the discussion of them that we are able to grow, learn to express what we believe and more importantly, why we believe what we believe and learn how to express that in coherent statements that some third party can use to develop their beliefs. Those beliefs will then become our life statements. Now these aren't written in stone and can be subject to change. But the free expression thereof is one of the greatest gifts our forefathers gave us.
But I am still unfriended. I'm not sad. I am praying they will come around (as I'm sure they are praying I will as well). I am more worried about the cowardice of the act of "un-friending" by not calling me up to discuss this, writing me expressing why they feel the way they feel or even what specifically they felt so upset about. That's right, I've no idea why I was unfriended. It could be they disagreed with my politics, my religious beliefs or my choice of friends. Maybe a joke I passed on. See, the assuming of the "why" is left to my imagination. Now those who know me will be only too happy to declare I have a great imagination. Did our friendship mean so little that it was easier to walk away than pursue it? At some point in everyone's life, a friend will just up and leave and you'll be left wondering as to what it was that caused it. It is not that they've chosen to leave but how you respond to this that will define you. Is this one of those moments? Can I choose to "be the bigger person" and let this relationship cease? Am I letting my imagination get the best of me? Maybe it really is "them and not me". I can come up with at least 100 different reasons, from real to imaginary, as to the "why" of this issue. What if they are waiting for me to apologize to them? Until they choose to let me in on the secret, there is little I can do about it.
My daughter asked me how I was going to deal with this. I told her that I would be taking the upper hand by letting this person go on without me. I am not defined by my abundance or lack of friends and also that friends come and go and all this is done in God's good timing. Also, maybe they responded in a knee jerk reaction that time will heal, but only if I stay out of it. Let go and let God. You know the difference between you and God? God doesn't think he's you. I am great at meddling into the problems of others and if they want me to meddle, they should ask me to do so. So, I'll rise above it, continue in my beliefs, talk to those who are brave enough or strong enough in their own beliefs to be able to come into the discussion. We might be able to change others minds, but only through loving kindness and not shutting the door on people who we disagree with. A closed mind gathers no knowledge.
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